Your life, your rules: How to build a routine that feels like freedom.
I love routines.
A well thought out routine that turns actions into habits, removes decision fatigue, and frees up my brain for all the things that make life magical? That is my jam.
But not everyone sees it that way.
I get given shit all the time for going to bed early, being “obsessed” because I go to the gym at the same time every day, for being "too structured" or "inflexible." People have told me that it’s better to be spontaneous or go with the flow more.
But here is the thing… having a solid routine allows you to REALLY go with the flow.
We hear all the time that routines are restrictive. That structure kills creativity. That having a schedule means living a life of rules and obligations instead of freedom.
But what if the opposite were true?
What if the right routine could unlock more freedom, more joy, and more energy?
The best routines aren’t about doing more. They are about making space for the things that actually matter.
The mistake most people make is forcing themselves into routines that do not actually work for them. They try to copy someone else’s schedule and wonder why they feel drained instead of inspired.
A powerful routine is not about control. It is about creating a rhythm that makes life easier, more productive, and more fulfilling.
It is time to stop seeing routines as something that cage you in and start seeing them as something that set you free.
1. Redefine What Routine Means to You
If the word routine makes you cringe, as I already said, you are not alone… but you might need a reframe.
A routine isn’t about micromanaging every hour of your day. It’s about creating a system that supports you, not suffocates you.
Ask yourself:
What do I want more of in my life? More energy? More focus? More peace?
What drains me and feels unnecessary?
What activities make me feel my best?
Your routine should make your life easier, in fact, rresearch in habit formation from Duke University shows that routines are most effective when they align with a person’s values and natural rhythms. When your routine works with you instead of against you, it actually sticks. It should help you prioritise what matters, not waste time on things that don’t. Think of your routine as a tool for expansion, not limitation.
2. Build in Flexibility
The reason so many people fail at routines? They make them too rigid.
A schedule that doesn’t allow room for real life is a schedule that will fall apart at the first unexpected event.
Instead of creating strict rules, build a structure that is strong enough to keep you moving forward but flexible enough to adapt when needed.
Try this:
Use time blocks instead of strict time slots. Instead of saying, “Work from 8:00 to 9:00 AM,” try, “Morning deep work session.” (Using a pomodoro timer is also a game changer for this)
Create non-negotiables. Identify the key things that need to happen daily but allow flexibility in when and how you do them. As women our energy levels aren’t the same all day. Plus, things crop up. It’s ok if sometimes your day doesn’t look the same and your needle moving action looks like 20 minutes one day and 2 hours the next. Just keep moving forward.
Add buffer time. Give yourself breathing room between tasks so you are not constantly rushing.
Studies in behavioural psychology show that people with flexible routines experience higher productivity and lower stress than those who follow rigid schedules. A good routine bends, it does’nt break.
3. Prioritise Joy and Creativity
Most people design routines around what they have to do, not what they actually enjoy.
But a routine that feels like freedom includes things that light you up.
Make time for:
Activities that you love like music, books, art, nature, or anything that makes you feel alive.
Play and rest… because constantly grinding does not lead to success, it leads to burnout.
Creative work when your mind is at its best.
Movement - Celebrate that amazing body of yours!
Your routine should energise you, not drain you.
Research has found that engaging in daily creative activities reduces stress and increases life satisfaction. When joy is built into your day, everything else becomes easier. A powerful routine is not just about what you do. It is about how you feel while doing it.
4. Align Your Routine with Your Natural Rhythms
Not all routines work for all people.
Some people focus best in the morning. Others get an energy surge in the afternoon. Some people have menstrual cycles. Forcing yourself to follow a routine that does not match your natural rhythms is the fastest way to exhaustion.
Instead of trying to fight your body, work with it.
If you are most focused in the morning, schedule deep work first thing.
If your energy spikes in the afternoon, plan movement or creative tasks then.
If you wind down best in the evening, use that time for reflection, journaling, or learning.
Give yourself grace when you’re low on energy and adjust.
Aligning your routine with your natural energy cycles boosts efficiency and prevents burnout. The best schedule is the one that actually works for you. Productivity comes from flow, not force.
5. Make It Easy to Follow
The best routines are the ones you actually stick to.
And the easiest way to make a routine stick?
Make it enjoyable. If you hate it, you will not do it.
Make it effortless. The fewer barriers, the better.
Try this:
Stack habits together. If you already drink coffee in the morning, add journaling or stretching to that habit.
Use reminders. Sticky notes, alarms, habit trackers…whatever works for you.
Remove friction. Set up your stuff the night before. Lay out your workout clothes or other triggers so you don’t have to think about it.
Studies show that habits are 40 percent more likely to stick when paired with enjoyable activities or structured in a way that removes obstacles. If your routine is easy to follow, consistency happens naturally. And as I’ve said 8 billion times, CONSISTENCY IS EVERYTHING.
*sidenote… if you want to learn more about habits, check this out
Final Thought: Your Life, Your Rules
Your routine is not about following someone else’s rules.
It’s about building a life that works for you.
Prioritise what actually matters.
Give yourself permission to adapt.
Make space for both productivity and joy.
The best routine is not the one that looks good on paper. It is the one that makes your life better.
