Main character energy: How to design a life that you actually want to star in
If your life was a movie, would you be the lead… or just an extra in someone else’s storyline?
So many people drift through life on autopilot, following expectations instead of actually choosing how they live. They wake up, go through the motions, and before they know it, years have passed, and they are stuck in a life that does not even feel like theirs.
I started noticing this early on. It sounds weird, but people constantly told me I was brave for doing things that, to me, felt like no big deal. Moving to a new country? Quitting jobs that did not align? Taking risks? I was just doing what I wanted to do.
And that was when it hit me… most people are not actually doing what they want to do.
They are waiting for permission. They are following someone else’s script. They are spectators in their own lives.
But here’s the truth… YOU are the protagonist of your own story…or at least you should be!
Main Character Energy is not about being self-absorbed or making everything about you. It is about living with intention, making bold moves, and stepping fully into your power.
Psychologists call this self-determination…the ability to take control of your life instead of letting external forces dictate it.
So if you are tired of feeling like an extra in your own life, it is time to rewrite the script.
1. Rewrite your narrative: Own your story
Every main character has a backstory. Some of it is good, some of it is messy. But here’s the thing… your past does not define you…your actions do.
You can’t always control what happens, but you can control how you respond.
Too many people get stuck in old narratives. They tell themselves things like:
"I am not the kind of person who takes risks."
"I have always been bad at this."
"People like me do not get opportunities like that."
These are just stories…ones you have the power to rewrite.
How to own it:
Identify the limiting beliefs that are holding you back and challenge them.
Rewrite your internal script. Instead of "I am stuck," say, "I am evolving."
Start journaling about your dream life as if you’re already living it. Your brain doesn’t actually know the difference between reality and visualization, which is why mental rehearsal is a proven confidence-building technique. (How bonkers is that?)
Example: Elle Woods – Legally Blonde
Elle Woods starts her story as the fun, fashionable blonde…the one no one expects to be taken seriously. When she gets dumped, she could have stayed in that role, believing the story she had always lived: that she was just a cheerleader, just the girlfriend, just someone who wasn’t “Harvard material.” But she doesn’t…She changes the script. She chooses a new story..one where she is ambitious, smart, and unstoppable. She gets into Harvard, and proves to herself that she is whoever she decides to be. Like a boss.
Main character move:
If you keep playing the same role, you’ll keep living the same story. Stop framing your life around limitations. Start telling it from a place of power.
2. Make bold choices: Stop playing it safe
Main characters do not wait for life to happen. They make things happen.
Fear and doubt will always be there, but confidence is not something you wait for. It is something you build by taking action, even when you’re unsure.
The more you challenge yourself, the more resilient and capable you become. Studies show that exposure to small risks and challenges not only increases confidence but also reduces anxiety over time.
How to be bold:
Say yes to things that excite you, even if they scare you.
Say no to anything that does not align with your vision.
Take risks that align with your dream plot…whether it is quitting a job, booking a solo trip, or finally launching that passion project.
Example: Andy Sachs – A Devil Wears Prada
When Andy takes a job at Runway, she is way out of her depth. She doesn’t fit in, she doesn’t know the rules. But she makes a choice. Instead of playing the role of the girl who “isn’t cut out for this,” she steps the hell up. She learns, adapts, and proves she can hold her own…not by becoming someone else, but by saying yes to the challenge and showing up fully in the space she’s in.
You won’t always feel ready. You won’t always feel like you belong. But growth happens the moment you stop doubting and start showing up.
Main character move:
If you keep waiting to feel ready, you’ll stay exactly where you are. Stop telling yourself you’re not good enough. Start showing up like you belong, and watch everything shift.
3. Romanticize your life: Find magic in the mundane
Your life does not need some huge plot twist to be exciting. It is all about perspective.
A lot of people think their lives are boring, but that is only because they are not paying attention.
Happiness is not just about the big moments. It is built in the small, ordinary joys that most people overlook…your first sip of coffee in the morning, a great song playing while you walk down the street, the way the sunlight hits your window. (Hot tip… a walk with your most epic playlist blasting is guaranteed to make you happy)
Research shows that people who practice gratitude and mindfulness experience higher levels of joy and fulfillment because they learn to appreciate these everyday moments.
How to romanticize your life:
Create a personal soundtrack. Make a playlist that makes your life feel cinematic.
Dress in a way that makes you feel like the main character. (Science backs this up…what you wear impacts your mindset.)
Be fully present. Notice the little things…your morning routine, the smell of fresh air, the feeling of stretching after a long day.
Make it magical. Light the candle, have a spa day, use the expensive dinnerware. Romanticizing your life is about treating it like it’s already special…not waiting for some future moment to make it feel that way.
Turn the ordinary into something extraordinary. Buy yourself flowers. Drink your coffee like you're in a Parisian café. Eat birthday cake for dinner. Walk down the street like you’re the lead in a film. The smallest shifts in perception can turn daily life into an experience worth savoring.
Example: Amélie Poulain – Amélie
Amélie does not live some wild, extravagant life. But she sees the world through a different lens. She finds joy in the smallest details…skipping stones, cracking a crème brûlée, leaving secret notes for strangers. She turns everyday moments into something beautiful.
Main character move:
Start capturing little joys every day. Take photos, keep a gratitude list, or just pause and soak it all in. Life is supposed to be a magical adventure. Make it feel like one.
4. Embrace your quirks: The secret to confidence
Main characters stand out. They are not trying to blend in.
The things that make you different are your superpowers.
But most people spend their lives trying to fit into someone else’s mold…watering down their personality, hiding their interests, and second-guessing themselves.
According to research, people who embrace their uniqueness experience higher self-esteem, deeper relationships, and lower stress levels. When you stop trying to be like everyone else, you automatically become more confident.
Main character move:
Stop apologizing for being different…start celebrating it!
Lean into your passions, no matter how niche or unconventional.
Speak your mind without diluting yourself to fit in
Example: Wednesday Addams – Wednesday
Wednesday Addams has zero interest in being like everyone else. She is unapologetically dark, sarcastic, and intensely independent…and that is exactly what makes her compelling. Instead of trying to fit in, she leans into what makes her different, and that attracts the right people and opportunities into her life.
Main character move:
Do one thing today that makes you you…whether it’s wearing an outfit you love, sharing an opinion without filtering it, or doing something just because it makes you happy.
5. Surround yourself with the right cast
Even the best main characters have a solid supporting cast.
If your circle does not hype you up, it might be time for a recast.
Science proves that we mirror the behaviors, energy, and mindsets of those around us. If you want to level up, you need to surround yourself with people who inspire and challenge you.
How to build your all star cast:
Spend time with people who uplift and push you.
Let go of relationships that drain your energy or make you feel less.
Seek out communities that align with your aspirations (whether online or in real life).
Example: Harry Potter – Harry Potter series
Harry does not defeat Voldemort alone. He has a cast of people who support him, challenge him, and have his back…Hermione’s intelligence, Ron’s loyalty, even Dumbledore’s wisdom. The right people elevate your story. The wrong ones hold you back.
Main character move:
Stop holding onto relationships that keep you small. Start surrounding yourself with people who challenge, inspire, and believe in you…because the right cast will help you become the main character you’re meant to be.
Final scene: It’s your Story…Make it worth watching
No more waiting. No more sitting on the sidelines. Your life is happening right now.
You are the one who gets to decide how your story unfolds.
Step into your role. Take control of your plot. Make it unforgettable.
We only get this one life…in this one body.
What are you going to do with it?
Ready to step into your main character energy?
If you’re ready to break out of autopilot, build confidence, and start making bold moves in your life…
Join my 21-Day Step Into Your Power Challenge.
For 21 days, you’ll get:
✔ Daily challenges to push you outside your comfort zone
✔ Journal prompts to help you rewrite your narrative
✔ Mindset shifts that will change how you see yourself and your potential
✔ Actionable steps to start showing up like the boldest, most unstoppable version of you
Your story is yours to write…so why not make it unforgettable?
Click HERE to join the challenge and start stepping into your power today.
